What does your tension have to do with it?

The tensions we carry in our bodies are often a result of an old protective need. An effort used to help us to protect ourselves. Overcome fears, we could not act upon. One aimed at not giving into a sense of helplessness: when we could not change the situation that was hurting us.

What we call stress-related efforts are a relic of those times. A decision we had to make, in order to best survive. We had to create a protective layer not to be “crushed” by the circumstances.

Today we do these efforts and stresses automatically, without being aware we do so, as a response to fear (which is stress). Fear of the unknown. Fear of failing. Fear of being hurt and unable to survive it. Fear of stepping up in a conflict. Fear of not being able to stand up for ourselves or refuse. We tend to think that efforts help us to be stronger. More capable. Think better and so on….

But that keeps us trapped and restricted. They hold us in fighting modus which disconnects us from trust and misleads us in interpreting the situation as a dangerous one. Dangerous as we hold the old belief or sensation of not being able to meet it.

They take away our mobility and flexibility and tie us to specific roles that are not giving us any freedom or choice.

Take a moment to pay attention to an effort or tension in your body.

Try to meet it with appreciation, knowing it was a decision you once made to help yourself. Think of it as meeting yourself at a moment in time, when you were frozen in fear. Or when you were creating a shell to deal with continuous hurt and shame.

Now it is your chance to free yourself from that frozen moment.

By being ready to give space to the feelings, sensations, and memories you were trying to save yourself from, you shift your experience.

Letting go is a mastery.

It is asking us to let the old frozen fear, emotions, and sensations come to life. To flow through us again. De-freeze and turn into a life-giving liquid that nourishes us. One that is then absorbed in the depth of our being and evolves into new.

It asks us to agree to acknowledge our old helplessness, without letting shame hold us back. Knowing that this effort had the best intentions. We did the best we could do with the limited abilities we had at the time.

When you pay attention to the tension in a specific place in your body, be with it.

Before hurrying to let it go, join it.

Do that effort intentionally more, as a way of listening to it.

Think of it as your voice that got frozen and blocked. When it was not heard nor expressed. One that could not refuse, expose what was wrong and hurting, or what you needed without judgment.

When you do that effort intentionally, you are making sure you learn and feel what is needed.

You can discover the intention it carries. This will allow you to better let go, and better your choices. It will ask you the courage to feel all that you have tried to bury and distance yourself from.

When you then choose to let go, make sure you breathe and move.

Make sure you are landing in your body, letting go of the effort in your head, and eyes. Letting go of the need to observe and know what will happen, as this effort keeps you held in the old helplessness.

You can repeat this 3-4 times in a row so that you can undo those layers and better digest what is being released.

Learning about your tensions and stressed based efforts, can free you from how you had to shape and suppress yourself to fit others. It may be the path to healing and recovering your heart. And can allow you to reconnect to your inner strength and be less reactive.

And most importantly you will regain more energy and suffer less from tension and pain.

I hope you will join your internal life - flow and defrost all those lost parts of yourself,

Anna

Photo by USGS on Unsplash